“Elchi” presents a new article by Maya Imran titled “Penny-by-penny joys.”
With endless love to all the little ones starting school this year…
I still remember my knee-high school socks with beaded ornaments on the sides. That was the only thing bought for my first day of school at my request. Everything else was what my older sister wore the previous year…
When there were only a few days left until school started, anticipation rather than joy reigned in our house. After all, it was not an easy task for an ordinary family to prepare four children for school. My mother would lay out what was left from the previous school year—whose shirt had become too small, whose shoes needed replacing—she would give the older child’s bag to the younger one, adjust the younger one’s skirt, and minimize what needed to be bought. With that, she would make a final list and “report” to my father: “10 shirvans will be enough.” In most school years, my desire for new clothes would turn into a dream with my mother’s stern “report.” Being the second child in the house always left me teary-eyed in this regard. When I cried and felt upset, my mother would end the matter at the root by saying, “Are they going to school to study, or to show off their clothes?!” Thus, I proved to my mother for 11 years that I didn’t go to school to show off my clothes – with old clothes and excellent grades.
Then my university life began. I realized that my mother didn’t need any proof from me regarding clothes; I was simply the child of a poor family.
Every month, my mother would write a letter and put it on top of the small amount of money sent from home. All the letters ended with the same sentence: “Spend the money carefully.”
The phrase “spend the money carefully” is a pleasing form of the instruction “save.” Even though the “nothings” were before our eyes, taking root in our days and months for years, my mother skillfully masked it: “Thank God, what don’t we have?! We have everything, but one must turn a blind eye to the absence of some things for more important things.” Perhaps no one could have taught us better than our mother the ability to turn what we have into something perfect instead of grieving over what is missing. There was one way to fight against lack – to study! In that lack, four educated children were raised. They were nurtured. Penny by penny, gram by gram. For my parents, material comparisons were always uninteresting.
“Oh, why do we care who wears what, who spends what?!”
But “little victories” like “I got the highest score in the group” or “they chose only me for this performance” made their eyes shine and brought a smile of pride to their cheeks. Fortunately, this boomerang gradually turned into a gratifying mission for us children and spiritual food for my parents – not a single manat that left my father’s hands and reached us from the budget of our poor house was regretted; each one returned in the form of success. Over the years, our successes filled the place we left behind in that small house. My mother wouldn’t throw away even the diplomas, certificates of appreciation, or the most ordinary certificates we earned; she would hang them on the wall, cherish them, and treasure them.
Compliments and thanks began to come to the city where we were proud of my father’s name, in our name and for our respect. The years had not been wasted – we had not only grown in age and height, but our names and minds had also grown. What we gained through “nothings” made us more determined and resolute. The essences that seemed attractive to us were different – more intelligence, more knowledge, and less arrogance. Everything that comes without effort is tasteless. And the values that lived experiences add to a person are more valuable than time itself. So valuable that it can only be instilled in a child.
Now my father is preparing for his grandchild’s first day of school – this year my son will go to the 1st grade. More enthusiasm, more anticipation. This time, my mother doesn’t determine what will be bought, and my father doesn’t buy it. But we are preparing to raise another schoolchild with what we learned from them.
For more than a year, my son has been counting the days to school, “Does school start after summer?”, “Does autumn start when school starts?”, “Will schools open after my birthday?” – the center point of his young age and big heart is school. Thanks to his love for school, he hasn’t spent the pennies his grandfather gave him all year, and with a patience uncharacteristic of a child, he has filled them into a glass jar and saved them. Every now and then, he counts up to the number he knows, saying “what can be bought with this many pennies?” and “measures” the amount of his money. To test the reliability of this love, I said, “You are grown up now and will go to school. We will buy what you need for school with your own money.” The small pennies had turned him into a king in the child’s world, and his glass penny jar into his treasure. Sparks of joy were in his eyes. The handfuls of pennies coming from his grandfather “enriched” his “treasure” month by month. As he learned to count the pennies that “fit” into one manat, 10 manats, 20 manats, he became more impatient for school and lengthened his list of things to buy day by day.
“Lots of colorful pencils,” “a big album,” “a picture notebook,” “a water bottle”…
Finally, the big day arrived – we went school shopping together. I chose what was to be bought, he liked it, and he would jump ahead of us with pride, saying, “Shall I pay for it?” Some moments and feelings are not experienced twice. That’s why there are moments that should be delayed on purpose and experienced slowly.
Chingiz Aitmatov says it better: “There are not enough words to describe some feelings. There is no need for that either.”
Now I am a parent too. But only now do I understand that because my father’s hard work mixed with my mother’s prayers, penny-by-penny joys turned into piles of success. This is the simplest truth of a happy life.
Dear son, may your love for school never fade. You are right – school is a place to be loved. It is the place where “you,” starting from us – from our home, turn into a wiser, more literate, and more successful person. In fact, everything is as simple and beautiful as you understand it. You just need love, perseverance, and determination.
Even for pennies to turn into joys…
Dear children, I wish you great enthusiasm and a successful educational life.
Maya İmran